The Waiting is Agony!

I have to let you know that the last 6 weeks have been agony for both Tammy and I 😦

Waiting for a decision from the British Consulate in New York is, without doubt, one of the hardest things I’ve ever experienced, and we still know nothing about our fate! By nature, I’m a positive person and I take some comfort in knowing that our application is strong and professionally compiled, but it is extremely difficult to feel positive amid this process.

If it’s rejected then we have some major mountains to climb and I know both of us are willing to wait for each other and will do whatever it takes to be together, but I also know it will take its toll on us and our families; as it’s affects them as well 😦

As I told you before, Tammy’s health is under attack as the whole process wears on her, this adds to my feelings of pain and frustration, I wish I could do more for her, to look after her like a good husband and best friend would.

She never ceases to amaze me with her inner strength, she believes herself to be weak, yet I know she’s amazingly strong! Her life story is one of many trials and tribulations, yet she has always managed to pull herself up off her knees and face the next day with the same beauty and grace; as she faced the last. If ever there was a measure of strength it is this and I’m so happy and proud to be her husband.

It’s been 14 weeks since we last held each other and I miss her terribly!

She has brought so much happiness and love into my life, I have never felt so good and I know Tammy feels the same way, it really is an amazing thing! So much so that we are prepared to go through this agony to be together forever 🙂

Adam x

Optimism and Despair

So it’s been a long while since I’ve posted and that is a reflection of how hard life has been for both Tammy and myself recently; being apart really is like falling into an Abyss!!

 

This Abyss tries it’s hardest to suck every drop of positive energy from you and leave you in despair.

 

Optimism and Despair (by Scott Breton)

We’ve been apart now since the 14th July and I don’t mind admitting that I’m depressed about that and I know that Tammy is too! We both know that in time that will be sorted and we can get on with our life together, but let me tell you; this isn’t for the faint hearted!!

 

Since I’ve been gone I seen my wife’s health degenerate and I’m convinced that some of this is down to us being apart. I’m a firm believer in that a positive outlook is really beneficial to our health, where a depression can cause acidity to eat at your health from within.

It’s upsetting to see the one you love struggling and not be able to be there and have that loving cuddle of reassurance 😦 Optimistic words can only go so far in helping and after a while I’m sure they can actually become irksome as your reassurances are repeated; I’m sure that sometimes Tammy’s thinking “if he says that again I’m gonna scream!”

Where are we?

A little over 2 weeks ago we submitted Tammy’s application to the British Embassy for acceptance as my Spouse to live in England, a little over 2 weeks ago we believed that (as stated on the UK Border Agency’s website) that 85% of settlement visa where processed within 15 working days; yet we were dismayed to discover that the New York’s office is averaging 39 working days!!!

This is not helping…….

State of Mind

Over the last few years and months I’ve learnt a lot about myself, the most important of which I consider to be my ability to go easy on myself, especially when others are having a go! I’ve taken to this mantra, if you are trying your best, giving it everything you have then you should be comfortable with yourself, you can do no more! Conversely, if I know I’ve been slacking then I’m setting myself up for sleepless nights!

Living by this philosophy has provided me with a defensive shield which protects me for the worst the world can throw at me, believe me it’s so easy to go overboard on yourself; which in turn leads to self doubt and fear.

Secondly, I’ve have, by default, become a far more patient man, this is a blessing and affords me the will power I need to stay faithful to my goals, ambitions and most importantly my wife!

In the past we have both been dealt a rough hand by those we loved, but now we have found each other we will never give up what we have for anything and in time the positive, healing effects of being in a mutually loving and respectful marriage will pay dividends to our wellness!

 

Respect and Peace!

Adam x

Galveston, Oh Galveston!

It seems like an age since our marriage and I miss Tammy terribly!! She’s my dearest friend and the most amazing woman a man could ever hope to have as a wife. It’s been a month since we tied the knot and when i think of that it cheers my heart knowing that we hopefully only have 6 weeks to wait until we are together again…..for good!!

However that is not the focus of this post, before that I’d like to share with you some of the photo’s and experiences of our honeymoon in Galveston.

For those of you that don’t know Tammy yet, let me start by saying she is the most considerate and thoughtful person. She never stops thinking about and planning for the things she needs or wants to do / achieve; she has a beautiful mind!

In typical male style, I’d never really thought of our honeymoon until Tammy said “I know where we could go!”

Well, she really hit the jackpot with this idea! In Galveston she’d made the perfect choice!

We were both very excited at the prospect of spending some quality time together, alone, a luxury that we know will be hard to come by in the future, with that in mind we made the most of our romantic break to the Gulf of Mexico!!

Our trip to Galveston would be the first occasion on which I’d drive in the states and I was very excited at the prospect of driving on their freeways, although I was a little anxious when the weather decided to take a turn for the worse.

In America, it’s commonplace for you to be undertaken by massive trucks, at great speed, even during a thunderstorm, rather disconcerting whilst you are aquaplaning beside them!

Despite the rain I really enjoyed the 285 mile (5  hour) trip, which saw us drive SE through Texas to the Gulf coast.

We spoke loads and it was really nice just to spend some time together, full of excitement about our honeymoon and the fact that we were now man and wife, something we both knew we would be from the moment we met.

Houston, Texas

The end of our drive was close as we passed through Houston, a city which was remarkable in that it looked and felt exactly like Dallas to me, however it is an amazing sight to see these skyscrapers jetting upwards towards the heavens 🙂

I love this picture!! Taken on the outskirts of Galveston I think the striking lines make this a great shot, especially when you when you consider we’re driving, great picture babe!!

This squadron of pelicans swooped directly over our car and were so graceful as they decided to escape the stormy weather which I guess they knew was coming lol. Wicked!

The beautiful Coppersmith Inn (Bed and Breakfast) was to be our honeymoon retreat for the next 2 days and Tammy really had scored a gem of a place when she found this, I can’t recommend this highly enough, without doubt a 5 star experience!!

Our room was amazing! Old character and beautifully furnished!!

What a dish!! The oysters weren’t bad either 😉

I’ll admit that I was quite apprehensive about eating these oysters, I think I’d only ever had one before and after a terrible tangle (gastroenteritis) with a prawn baguette many years ago, I’ve always shied away from raw fish or shellfish. I will say that they were sensational, served with a fiery horseradish sauce, lemon and another spicy dip on a crunchy biscuit base they went down a storm!! (thankfully they stayed down too!)

One of Tammy’s favourite pictures, she loves the clouds and I think she’s right, these are the stairs to our room at the Coppersmith.

God!! How lucky am I!!!

These photo’s were taken on our walk from the Coppersmith to the beach, it was warm but damp, with occasional showers that were later to turn into a mini hurricane!! Lol, I’d left the wettest weather in history in the UK and came to Texas and found it raining!!

Love this photo of a pavement that had grown up with the trees!!

Galveston beach isn’t the prettiest beach in the world, but it does have bags of character, the sea wall being one of the famous sights of Galveston, a mural that spans the length of the beach, is abstracted with paintings of imaginary fish, quite nice how it cheers up what would otherwise be a very plain object.

The fishing peer

Baywatch the Galveston way!

The hall of the Coppersmith Inn, a really grand building!

Galveston has made its living off  the oil fields at sea and the seafood. Once it was a rich city and it boasts many old and grand buildings, but they often suffer from devastating hurricanes and as such it does look a little dilapidated in parts, and there are many unoccupied buildings and homes.

We spent a brief but very enjoyable (windswept) 2 days in Galveston, managing to have a 5 star meal one night and a night in with a pizza and a film, it was lovely spending time with my lovely wife.

It was time to leave and go and spend the remainder of my visit with the kids and we had some plans to make the most of our time. So we made our way home and on right on queue the rain lashed down, but as we drove home to Lancaster I couldn’t help but think that I was the luckiest man alive!!!

The driving rain!

The man that created a city!

I hope you enjoyed the photo’s of our honeymoon, there were many more and eventually I’ll get them up on facebook, but I think these are some of the best that we took. Photography is another interest we both enjoy and I look forward to a life of geekyness with Tammy, where we can indulge in each others hobbies and passions.

I can’t think of anything more wonderful than finding your best friend and soul mate and to know that you will share the rest of your life with them!! Awesome!!

Adam x

Our Big Day!!

It’s unbelievable to think how quick life changes and how good it can feel if you embrace it without fear of the unknown! Knowing that both Tammy and I were very ready to be married again, and without fear for the undoubtedly difficult times ahead; we made the arrangements for our marriage.

In this post I aim to share some of the things that were going on behind the scenes, as well as some photos of my visit you won’t have seen yet, it is written from my point of view and I’d imagine Tammy will write one from her side shortly.

Best laid Plans

With my 40th birthday fast approaching, the date for the wedding stuck out like a sore thumb, and so Sunday July 8th 2012 would be a the special date, a date we shall never forget and more importantly I have no excuses for missing our anniversary 😉

You’ll appreciate that planning a wedding can be hard work and stressful at the best of times, let alone when both parties are separated by 5000 miles! As ever Skype and the internet came to the rescue!! Allowing us to plan, purchase and communicate all of the things that go into a wedding. That said, I know I had the easiest of it as Tammy and a couple of her friends Samantha Hensel and Lisa Lanier, along with The Pastor’s daughter Angie Cagel and her hubby David really got stuck into the preparation. Thanks guys x

All I could do was be there for Tammy when we needed to discuss plans or let her vent off some of her stresses, she had a few bless her.

Tammy really is an amazing woman, hence my love for her, for example how many of you could cope with this?

• Full time mother of 5 wonderful, yet untidy kids lol.
• Degree student with final exams in the period running up to wedding!
• Co-caring for her Grandmother who has Alzheimer’s
• Preparing for a visa application for 5………complicated and stressful
• Endless housekeeping
• Whilst living apart from your partner.

Not easy hey?!

Yet she finds endless courage and faith to get up out of bed every morning and crack on with all that the world throws at us, incredible inner strength and it hurts not being able to be there a share her load. But that will be a thing of the past soon!!

I digress!….. Where was I?…… Oh yes!

All of our plans were set and eventually the date for my trip to Texas came round. Unfortunately it was only going to be a short trip, 8 days in fact and so with that in mind we made a pledge to ‘max out‘ the days, donning the mantra ‘Sleep is for whimps’.

On Thursday the 5th of July I began my journey to Tammy’s-ville, it was a really nice and heart warming experience actually, as I posted at different stages of my journey on Facebook and received lots of encouragement and best wishes from my family and friends xx

So after a little while travelling 😉 I made it to Texas!!! It was about 9pm (Friday 6th), in Texas and after dropping off my luggage at a genuine Motel it was time to go over to see Alex and wish her a Happy 18th Birthday!! 

Yes! I wasn’t the only person celebrating a birthday that week, both Bryant and Alex had birthdays that week and another reason to visit when I did. Bryant was 12 on the Thursday and Alee was 18 on the Friday, great month for a birthday methinks 😉

My poor mum will be beside herself next year as June and July must now hold at least 15 birthdays for her to remember lol.

Rehearsal

On the Saturday we went and got my tuxedo fitted and gathered a few last minute items before going over to the church to deliver the cakes and prepare the chapel for the wedding. We’d decided to go Anglo American with the decor, with the Stars n Stripes and the Union Jack on display, no brainer really it was simple and gave the proceedings a nice, colourful feeling.

Anglo American

The weather nosedived quickly after my arrival lol, Texas was relieved to have the rain, but I’d just left the UK with some of the wettest weather on record!!

During a break in our preparation and before the wedding rehearsal there was an almighty storm, preceded by this cloud formation, to which both Tammy and Lisa both said “oh! that doesn’t look good!” I’m thinking this looked amazing and then the penny dropped, they were really worried that a tornado was forming and then I said “come on then, let’s get off the road and somewhere safe”, I don’t mind admitting I was more than a little concerned lol.

Big weather in Texas!!

Luckily the torrential rain that followed several massive thunder claps helped dissipate the forming tornado and we made it safely to a burger restaurant, albeit a little wet lol.

After our brief snack at ‘Wataburger’ (my favourite burger chain in the US…..official lol) we headed back to the chapel to meet the Pastor, Herb Pederson and to go through the proceedings and to make sure that everybody knew what they were doing beforehand. I’m so glad we did this and it gave everyone a chance to ask questions about the service and for us to decide finally exactly how it would go.

Sunday Morning………

saw myself and Bryant, who’d kept me company at the Motel, seek some much needed breakfast! We went big 😉

IHOP was the venue, yes Ladies and Gentlemen the INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF PANCAKES!!!!!!!!

(The scene of much devastation last September when I attempted to eat 4 blueberry pancakes and spent the rest of my day (travelling back to the UK) in some discomfort and swearing never to return to said place!)

However on the morning of our wedding, the nerves were kicking in big time and fortification was a necessity!!! I had to eat, so I settled for a spicy chicken sandwich and fries at 9.30 am lol, you gotta love the Americans!

After this mahoosive feast we both went back to get ready and await our lift from my best man, Terry and his wife Ginny (Tammy’s Sister). We stopped at a Walmart and got some last, last minute items for the wedding lol

Clockwork

We arrived at the church about 12.30 and both Terry and myself set about setting up the Skype transmission for my family. I couldn’t expect any of my family to come to the wedding, it’s so expensive and so the next best thing was to hook Skype up and broadcast back to the UK live.

However, my Dad’s brother, Uncle Malcolm did come to the wedding with his wife Sharon, they live in Sho lo – Arizona and it was great that they both could make it! I haven’t seen them in ages and it was a real treat xx

Uncle Malcolm and Auntie Sharon (and my beautiful wife)

By this time the nerves were really setting in and whilst Terry, an IT consultant by profession, finished off the Skype connection; I went and got dressed in the Tux.

From left 2 right: Bronc (Alex’s friend), Bryant and me

Here we are after just after hooking up with my family on Skype

My best man – Terry Moorhead

Terry really is a stand up guy, I’ve known him for just under a year and I really like him, he’s a cool customer, unflappable it seems, he’s very laid back and yet you can tell that he will not suffer fools gladly. We both hold many of the same values and thoughts about life and politics, and I knew instantly that he’d be my best man! Cheers Terry, you’re a star!!

It was a shame my boys couldn’t have come over for the wedding, there were several reasons why this wouldn’t have happened and I know that Lewis was unhappy about it. However, we have a plan that will hopefully make up for the disappointment a little, when we finally have a date for Tammy and the kids arrival we aim to hold a wedding reception for those that couldn’t make it in England. This will give family and friends the opportunity to meet my beautiful wife and a chance for Lewis and Jack to get in on the act 🙂

Breathtaking

So the time came for the ceremony to start! I’d been pacing about the place, trying to remember my vows, everything that we’d worked so hard for was now in sharp focus! It was great!! Everything had come together perfectly and besides the obvious nerves I was confident that we had all bases covered.

My wedding vows.

When I saw Tammy come into the chapel, her beauty literally took my breath away!! I was so happy and couldn’t believe how lucky I was to be her husband! We’d worked so hard trying to get our special day right and as all it went so smoothly, just perfect and I want to say a very big thank you again to those that helped us, that we love you and without your help it just wouldn’t have been so special!

Mr and Mrs Dixon!

C’mon!!!

 Adam x

Visa Application

As you know Tammy and I have been in a long distance relationship for well over a year now, we’ve both travelled to each others homes to be together and to strengthen our love. We both know that we want to spend the rest of our days together and are set to get married in under 3 weeks now (July 8th – come on!).

You may also know that Tammy is not returning with me to England straight away 😦 The plan is for her and her kids to come over in October, after the visas have been approved.

We’ve heard many horror stories about how difficult visas are to get granted, so we’ve taken nothing for granted! We are using an agent for the whole application process and I will let you know who they are after Tammy has the visas gripped firmly in her hands! All I will say for now is that our agent knows her stuff and we have every confidence in her.

The whole process isn’t cheap, just one visa alone costs £825 to apply for, yes apply for, if you are refused you lose the fee too! Again another reason to get everything straight before you apply. This fee is the same regardless of age, so all of the kids visas cost the same! What a racket!

One of the clouds that cast a large shadow of doubt over the whole process has just evaporated as the UK governement has just released the new ‘Income Threshold’ figures for those wishing to sponsor a spouse for visa applications, obviously where I am the sponsor for Tammy’s application. So as of the 9th of July, the day after the wedding coincidently, UK law changes so that a sponsor must earn the minimum of £18,500 to sponsor an adult visa, with an additional £2,400 per child/dependant applicant.

There were concerns that this would be set much higher than this and could have scuppered our plans, so what better wedding gift could we ask for, we now know that I earn enough and that, with all things being equal, Tammy’s visa is looking more of a cert than a hope!

Believe me! This is a great weight off our minds and our dreams of being together are coming into sharp focus now and I can’t wait til the day I meet them all at the airport!!!

 

Adam x

What is it?

What is it that makes me do whatever it takes to be with you?

What is it that sends me into space with dreams of our shared life together?

What is it that makes me the happiest person on the planet?

What is it about our love that shields me from worst the world could throw at me?

What is it that makes me know that this is the happiest I’ve ever been in my life?

What is it when I know, without doubt, that I ‘have’ to spend the rest of my days with you?

Woman you need to know that I’m crazy about you!

I will do everything within my powers to make you feel happy, to keep you and your kids safe from harm, to love you without reservation, to love your kids like I love my own, to be a loyal and loving husband, with honesty and respect for you, because you are the most amazing woman on the planet Tammy!!

I have never known anyone like you, so strong and yet so sensitive, so beautiful inside and out, so funny and playful, intelligent and talented.

In you, I have found the perfect woman and knowing this has answered all of the questions above. The love that we share is priceless! I’m am so lucky to have you and I want to spend the rest of my life celebrating that fact and loving you the way you deserved to be loved. I wish life had have been nicer to you Tammy, but now I know that finally you will have the life you always dreamt of 🙂

With only 3 weeks before we get married I wanted to let you and the world know how much I love you and that becoming your husband will make me the proudest man on Earth!!

With all of my love

@dam

XXX

Useless!

I’m worried about my woman! For the past week and a half Tammy has been suffering with kidney stones, she’s been in a lot of pain and after seeing 2 of the stones that ripped their way through her last week, I can understand why. No kidding these stones were rough and irregular in shape and 4 – 5 mm in diameter!! I’m left feeling totally useless and worried about her, trying to remain positive and upbeat until she can make her doctor’s appointment on Monday.

If you’ve never seen a kidney stone then check this out, this isn’t hers but is the closest I could find the ones she has shown me on Skype.

So these form inside the kidney, whose role it is to filter the blood of the minerals and elements that aren’t required by the body.  Some people are more susceptible than others to stones, as our bodies all work differently when processing the food and drink that we consume. Tammy has had major problems with her kidneys before and is no stranger to the pain, she is amazingly brave when dealing with it and I feel completely helpless and inept.

It’s sod’s law that this would kick off only a month before our big day and I really hope the doctors can help her recover in time! For those of us in the UK it’s difficult for us to understand the US medical system, we take the amazing NHS for granted, ok we pay our National Insurance for it, but when you consider what we get for our money it really is amazing!!

For Tammy to even visit the doctor in Texas will cost several hundred dollars as she doesn’t have medical insurance that will cover her condition, if they refer her to a specialist then she would have to fork of 1000’s of dollars!! We will have to wait and see what her doctor thinks about her condition. I believe they do have a free hospital service for the very poor and this is massively over subscribed and may not be able to deal with her case in a timely manner, so we’re are in the lap of the God’s on this one.

Not ideal preparation for your wedding and Tammy is a fighter and despite having a very difficult week, she has come out fighting, although this morning she feels sick to her stomach and totally washed out! Monday can’t come soon enough!

I’m not religious, but today I’m gonna pray for her safety and speedy recovery xxx

I love you Tammy xxx

It’s been a while…..

Since I posted, work has been mental and there’s no sign of that changing lol, but on the whole it’s great! I am very fortunate in that I work with some really nice people and believe me, that helps a lot.

So what are we up to?

Well it’s now full steam ahead in preparation for the wedding (can’t wait) and the subsequent visa application. As you can imagine it’s intense but in the best way possible 🙂 I’m sure we’ll look back on this period of time with great fondness and say to each other ” How ever did we manage!?”

The simple answer to this question is with love, determination and support from our friends and families, of which I can’t thank highly enough. To all of you who have helped us and encouraged us to go for it, well I’m sure speak for both of us when I say we love you and without your support it would be extremely difficult xxx

I’m sure a few people have wondered why we even bothered with the whole blog thing, well take it from me it really helps us stay focussed and happy. When you’re in a long distance relationship you’ll take every possible interaction with your loved one. As we met through blogging it seemed a perfect way to express our love for one another and sharing our relationship with our families and friends, which hopefully will help them understand why we are doing this 🙂

A little over a week ago we had our marriage counselling with Tammy’s pastor, he will be marrying us and Texan law states that you must have completed this before the application to marry. The interview was held over 2 days for a total of 4 hours, of course we completed this on Skype and it was great! Brother Pederson is also one of Tammy’s professors at Dallas Baptist University (DBU) and I’d already met him last year when I visited Tammy. He’s a really nice fella and I could have talked with both him and Tammy for many hours more!

Tomorrow I have to get an affidavit notarised (verified) by a solicitor to confirm who I say I am, and then this will be sent to Tammy to make the marriage application  in my absence, I wish I could be there with her for that 😦

We only have 5 1/2 weeks to go now before we are together again and I can’t wait, I miss her big time! We spend loads of time together on Skype but I really long to kiss her again xxx

Adam x

Leap of Faith

Forever he’d searched, forever unquenched!

One moment his heart called him to fly.

Knowing it, feeling it,

He knew that he needed to walk with her.

Thus he leapt,

To take his chance of happiness.

To meet his friend and confidante,

He soared above the clouds and towards the Sun he hastened.

“How high would you fly to seek your destiny?” The shadows called

“How long would you leap?” They cracked

“As far and as long as I am possible! For there is eternal love at stake!” Boldly striding he left them behind

“Be’gone demon spirits!!! There’s no room in here , you’re not welcome!! Be’gone!!” he retorted broadly smiling.

Never had he known such a feeling, nor would he again as he lived beside his love,

Forever happy they knew that their faith had been rewarded with life’s greatest prize!

Adam x

“Transformers, More Than Meets The Eye”

I know what you are thinking, everything sounds too perfect, almost like it is fake,…nothing this real and awesome relationships like this do not actually exist except in movies. Little scrap metal dreams wishing on stars.

Well,…………

You are wrong.

All of it is real and it is this good and better.

Just like with Transformers, there are other aspects to this relationship that make it what it is. And just like with any relationship, if you want to hold on to what you love, you work at it and you fight the battles together.You are a team. This is a great concept when thinking the Olympics are about to start.

But sometimes the players on the team have differences, sometimes with others and sometimes with each other and yet you still have to keep fighting on the same team. You still have to be strong and respect and love each other through it all,…and we still have to fight for what we have together, along with fighting our war in our world..the world of cynicism, disbelief, lust, greed, selfishness and no compassion.

Tiny fragments and chunks of repair work exist in it along with resetting the programming….it took someone looking at an old beat up and broken wreck and seeing the full beauty that was still in it and giving it new life and a chance at being on a winning team….and I fell in love with him and took off after this because it wasn’t a dream,…it was reality!

BUT,..there are days when I feel I fail him as a partner for ever fearing over things at all. There are days when we disagree and even say things we feel, but did not want to use to hurt one another.

But isn’t that how real relationships go?

You have moments where you fumble……..

and cry because you feel bad that you didn’t  get it right, but then your teammate bends down and picks you up and the next thing you know you are making all the goals…..TOGETHER. and WINNING! 😉

The battles come up and one person looks at them and gulps and the other looks at them and says, “Game on! we can do this!”  And on another day, your roles reverse and the turn is taken in being the one to keep morale.

KEEP FIGHTING!

It isn’t about losing sight in a goal or not believing,…it is about having faith in yourself and someone else having faith in you as well, what makes it enough is LOVE….

Love,….to get through the struggles and the days where you fumble and you have to get back up and keep going. Because,…..the goals ARE IMPORTANT!

Goals.

Goals and teams.

Adam is the most goal focused and team oriented player I know,…at work and with me and this family.

Take a look at this excerpt from his funny, but actually true in content, email to me today:

“I’m here on the outskirts of this quaint market town and I’m delighted to be able to report to you, LIVE, on what has been nothing short of an amazing feat of garden preparation! The crowds have all but dissipated now, with just a few hangers on, wondering if they make steal a glimpse of the lone worker who created this fine slabbage”

“Dick, we’ve seen the pictures and I have to say it’s seems unbelievable to think that this was the work of only one man and in such a short time! There are rumours that he was able to complete this task just as soon as he returned from taking his kids to school! Can you confirm these rumours?”

“Troy, we heard those rumours too! And the number of eye witnesses that can confirm this really make it more fact than rumour!”

“Dick, whilst we speak there are still further reports that he also managed to complete numerous household chores, for example a weeks worth of ironing was also completed before 11am, this really is quite a remarkable day if they are true! Wouldn’t you agree?”

“Troy, I certainly would and it appears we are dealing with a very determined man, who is intent on doing his utmost to provide a fine life for his family, as well as securing promotion in the near future!”

I can NEVER match him in this. I always feel like I am short of the mark compared to him,  because of little and sometimes big anxieties,…fears dug into me from scars of other horrible people. Even though I always wanted to believe in fairytales, mostly, reality kicked my a** and I wound up being trained that always the bad things would happen and never could believe the good would last or ever be for me.

Now I have a new trainer and teammate, Adam. And he always wishes he could go back and protect me from all the evil forces of those loser DECEPTICONS,…

But since he cannot change what has happened, he teaches me, has patience with me, loves me so strongly and deeply and has great understanding with me….

He runs me through some of the same course, but with better plays and more effort and real belief/faith in me.

He sees me as a winner where sometimes I do not see myself.

He even has been hurt by my fear at times, but he still stays and fights the battle. He has even been attacked by others who are against him and our fight to be together. But he still stands….. my Transformer,…

My OPTIMUS PRIME!

Happy Birthday Wishes!!

Dearest Tammy

Today is your birthday and I’d like to celebrate this special day with you!!

I’m sending you all of my love, kisses and best wishes xxx

Next year and forever more we will be able to celebrate our birthday’s together and I can’t wait!!

I chose your birthday song for several reasons, I know you’ll appreciate the choice and the message behind it 🙂

I hope you have a wonderful day and you like your present!

Can’t wait to speak to you later

XXX

Way out West!

Understatement

When we decided that it would be amazing for us to meet and take things from there, it suddenly dawned on me that this was the beginning of one of the most incredible adventures of my life. Having never been to the US of A before that in itself would be pretty spectacular, but to meet the woman of my dreams just sent the whole idea off the scale!! To say I was excited was the biggest understatement since the Black Knight from Monty Python’s Holy Grail conceded he had a flesh wound!!

So for those of you who’ve never been to the USA I thought I’d write a piece about my experience of America and what I thought of the country and its culture.

I remember the excitement when I’d bought the flight tickets! C’mon!!!

Anyway to cut to the chase, I went to America last Sept (2011), taking a BA flight from Heathrow’s new terminal 5, needless to say this is one awesome place!! You can’t help but be anything other than impressed by the scale of the place, for me it adds a great deal to the whole experience. I love travelling and have only travelled in Europe before, so this trip was by far the furthest flung destination for me and I was going to savour every minute of it!!

It’s vast!!

 I arrived in Dallas Fort Worth Texas after my 10 hour non-stop flight on this bad boy!

When all the guff at the airport was done with I finally got to meet Tammy and boy oh boy that was something special that I shall never forget for as long as I live!! We kissed for sometime 😉 and then thought we’d better crack on and meet the family!

Get this! Texas had been in a drought for many months and the day I arrive it bloody starts raining lol!! A good thing for the Texans but I couldn’t help but laugh at the irony. In this photo you’ll see that we were at an American football game, just a inter-school game, but they had cancel it because of the storm that whipped up only moments after this picture was taken. If you’re not used to big weather and you want to experience it, go to the States!!! They don’t do anything small!!! Crikey only a month ago Tammy’s house came within a mile of being wiped out by an F3 Tornado, I was actually on Skype with her at the time it was raging outside her house, very scary, but I knew she’d be alright; I just knew.

This thing actually changed direction at a junction and then when it had gone about a mile to the right of their home, then changed back on to it’s original course and wiped out 300 homes and buildings!!! Miraculous!!!

I digress……..

So yes it hits you immediately just how vast the place is and how spread out everything is, when you’re used to living on top of your neighbour and having no real space to your own, save inside your house, seeing the size of the houses and their gardens here was an eye opener. When you consider that for a 6 bedroom house with a swimming pool and double garage and an 1/2  acre of garden could only set you back approx. $160 – $180,000 or £100 – £110,000, you begin to understand how much land they have and how little it costs.

The Texan skies are just something else, they really are huge, that sounds odd i grant you, because they’re no bigger than ours, but the scale of everything changes your perception of the sky, it appears to be much bigger.

This picture was taken on our way to the iconic drive in cinema, I’ve posted about this before so I won’t bore you with that again, needless to say if you come to the States, go to the drive in, it’s and ACE way to watch a flik.

You drive everywhere in the States, it’s too big and all the shops and schools and stuff are just too far apart for you to even attempt walking. I didn’t see a bus in Lancaster, (save a school bus) the whole, entire time (lol, private joke) I was there. Sure they had them in Dallas city but where I think they need them they say is too risky to have them. That should tell you a whole other story about the States!

We’ll soon need one of these!

Gas, Gas, Gasoline

One of the most noticeable things is the trucks! To the Americans they’re just run of the mill vehicles, but to me it was like the Monster Trucks were on a day out!! You know what a Hummer looks like right? That giant truck designed originally for military use, then domesticated and blinged up to the eyeballs, well they’re small!!!

I mean these trucks are huge man!!! To give you some idea of how big this puppy was, the picture was taken from a rather large people carrier, with a high driving position and then this truck rolled past us!

Can you imagine sending your kids to schools where they have signs like this dotted around the entrance? Actually it’s not a problem that’s unique to America , I remember as a teenager going to Brixton Academy (London) to watch the girls play basketball, they had signs similar to this one at the entrance to the gymnasium halls. That said the signs in Lancaster TX, did seem a little more menacing, and to have them at a school is very concerning for any parent. I think living in an English market town has me taking certain things for granted, for example, how safe life is in King’s Lynn!!

Sky’s the Limit

One of the things I really hoped we could find time for was a visit to Dallas, luckily we had an afternoon free and after Tammy’s morning lecture we made our way 30 mins north of Lancaster to the big city! One of the things about this part of Texas is that it’s quite flat and open clear land, so as you leave Lancaster you can see Dallas in the distance. The skyscrapers thrust themselves skywards and like shards of light they demand your attention, a very impressive sight that I’m so glad I got to enjoy.

Iconic!!

The land of the free?

Revelation

I knew that Americans are very religious but I hadn’t imagined how much their faith is integrated into their daily lives, by that I mean the church owns schools, universities and community rooms and no doubt many other things that I’m blatantly ignorant to. Tammy is religious and even though I’m an agnostic I respect her beliefs greatly, and I wanted to go to her church and appreciate her life and all aspects of it.

This is church American Style!

This is a Baptist church and they believe in delivering the message with a high tech theatrical style, with a big show, music, lights, videos and guests. Actually the service was very entertaining and I was pleasantly surprised, that said after the first salvoes of music and song had finished the Pastor dived straight in with how important it was to give, to support the church community by offering tithes. Tithes are donations to the church, which have been in existence from the start of the whole church movement and usually run at 10% of your income!!!

This is a profound cultural difference and it made me feel a little uneasy about the rest of the service, but when you step back and consider that the church invests huge sums of money in education and supporting the community; it may actually be a good thing……..I’m undecided.

Fast Food and Lots of it!!

Everybody knows that America is the home of fast food, but again I don’t think many people really understand the scale of this industry unless they’ve been there and witnessed it for themselves. In England Mcdonalds is the big daddy of fast food and even though they are probably the biggest in the US too, it certainly didn’t feel like they have the lion’s share like they appear to enjoy in the UK.

My most memorable fast food experience whilst there was the breakfast we all enjoyed at the IHOP on the last day of my visit. IHOP stands for ‘International House of Pancakes’ lol you gotta love these guys!!

I had a stack of blueberry filled pancakes and they messed me up for hours!!!

So there you have it, just a few of my observations that I made on my visit to Texas, It’s definitely a wonderful country, but I’m not sure I’d want to live there full time, I suppose it’s like anywhere else, if you find the right place it doesn’t matter where that is; also it’s like Tammy says “Home is where the heart is”.

Adam x

 

David Bailey!! Eat your heart out!!!

When Tammy came over to England to visit me and my family, to see our new home and explore the country we went to some beautiful places, oh and King’s Lynn too lol. I shouldn’t laugh really, it’s been a good home to me for 20+ years and I’ve made some great friends here and it’s perfectly located in the East of England. Only an hour away from 3 very different  and beautiful cities, all of which are well worth a visit.

Those cities are Cambridge, Norwich and Ely, you could include Peterborough within the hours driving distance from Lynn, but I can’t think of a good reason to go there, save maybe the shopping arcade for the ladies…….I’ll pass I think. But the other 3 are great, steeped in history, beauty and glorious architecture, needless to say I took Tammy to all of them during her stay here in England.

We also visited some of Norfolk’s premier seaside resorts, Brancaster, Hunstanton and Wells next to Sea all had a whistle stop tour and despite the weather we had a marvellous time! For years I took this place for granted, but slowly as my kids grew, I sought new ways to entertain them and inevitably explore the region, I  realised what a beautiful part of the world I live in.

So what’s this post all about then? Well as Tammy eluded to in one of her previous posts, we both took lots of snaps during her visit and I used my phone to take them because I haven’t a camera and I had downloaded a Photoshop app on it and It’s very good at turning something ordinary into something quite arty lol.

Here are the fruits of my labours.

Ely Cathedral Cherub

Churchyard

Wonder Woman

Wells next the Sea

Brancaster

Ely Cathedral

St John’s College – Cambridge

Brancaster Beach

Tammy in Brancaster

 Well I won’t give up the day job just yet, but Tammy’s visit sparked more than a passing interest in photography, so it appears I now have another geeky string to add to the geek bow!

Respect and Peace!

Adam x

Beach and Church Hopping :)

This post will be less writing and more pictures. I just wanted to share the different beaches and the Churches we visited. Adam knows my affection for art and beauty and my affection for the church and there are many amazing churches in England,…even around where we have our home. When i saw the old churches built centuries ago and the beauty over the craftsmanship and detailed work that went into them, it really made me wonder why we went astray from the old ways of architectural beauty.

The beaches we visited were:

Brancaster Beach,..right down the road from our home.

Then we hopped over to Wells By The Sea:

As you can see, it was low tide.

And Side Tide,..lol..just kidding,..this one was taken leaning over the rail with the wind blowing my hair in my face and I did not realize I had the camera turned. 🙂

Time for HOT coffee and something delicious! at Wells Deli :  http://www.wellsdeli.co.uk/index.html

   

And continue with church hopping…for we had actually started with the church hopping on our drive to Brancaster and Wells 🙂

I cannot tell you what the names of the little villages were, you would have to ask Adam. I am still learning 🙂

But here are some of the churches we stopped and took pictures of…very easy to take good pictures,..lol..as an old professor of mine once said, “just point and click”…. 😀

Nope,..that is not a church…but I do almost worship the ground he walks on,…almost,..do NOT want to be sacrilegious…Sorry, Father!

Here you go:

Adam has the cooler B & W Photoshop of this….cheater…lol 😉

And then there was ELY…WOW!

Amazing architecture! wish it hadn’t been so cloudy so we would have had more light for our pictures inside ELY CATHEDRAL.

saying our prayers…..

Spitting image…lol

haha,..that’s more like it..

And another day of the beach! Hunstanton..ot “hunston” if you say it like they do 😉

low tide again…

all the fun rides closed for the season..drat!

but the arcade was open for the boys! They just had to wait until their dad and I explored the beach for a bit.

And the boys finally went into the arcade where Jack won 1,000 tickets on a spin for tickets!

Time for Fish and Chips and to go home………

Pop!

Okay, so I have kind of skipped a little here and I want to back track just a little to when Adam actually proposed. It is quite funny actually.

So, here I was having spent the night in London in a hotel and having spent the next day full of sights and sounds and street performing shows and all, and we were finally,…finally headed to our home, which I still had never seen in person. I was tired and hungry and excited and blown away by the feeling of love with Adam. I was on a major RUSH!

We finally made it back into Kings Lynn by train from Kings Cross and we had all my luggage to carry to the car he had parked about a block or so away. It was later than we had planned to be back, close to 10pm.

We walked from the station and made it to the car, put the luggage in the back of the car and then he got in the car to start it .

About this time, Adam noticed that the side mirror on the driver’s side of his car had been knocked off, most likely purposeful, but we were never to know the culprit.

The next little whammy popped when he discovered the battery to his car was dead.

In his excitement the day before, he had forgotten to turn off the lights when he parked the car. Come on give him some slack! He was thinking of other things and we have all done something of the same sort before! 😀

I cannot tell you how embarrassed he seemed to be about that. he kept saying over and over that it was a “school boy error”. I was not upset with him. I told him it was not a big deal and we could take the bus back to our house and it would be fine with me.

So while he was telephoning his dad and hoping he would answer, we were walking to the bus station another few blocks away.

Adam was upset with the car being out of commission and it putting a wrench in schedules, for he had planned we would stop and get chinese/curry take out on the way home and just relax after the long plane journey and day in London. Plus, he was due to pick up his boys in the morning and that would have made that very difficult.

As it turned out, his dad answered and they figured a way to get it jumped while I was going to stay at the house and unpack,..then we would go get the chinese. Delish!

The bus brought us to the end of our street with a short walk with luggage to the driveway and then in and up the stairs. I cannot even begin to tell you how much I loved our home!

I was so happy that I cried and Adam gave me a few hugs and kisses and apologized about the car again and then rushed around getting ready for his dad to pick him up to go do the jump. I went and sat on our bed and unpacked my bags, still crying a little bit at the unbelief of happiness that I was actually there!!

About a minute later, I heard Adam grumble, ” Oh, Buggah!” and I thought maybe he had done something to his finger shutting the drawers, since he was in the kitchen. I didn’t look around. A few seconds later, I hear him call from the living room to me.

“Tammy, can you come here and help me for a minute?”

He was down on his knees and holding his back. He said, “I think you are going to have to help me with something.”

I was instantly worried he had injured his back or something and went to try and help him up, asking, “What is it? What happened?”

He pulled his hand from behind his back and held up to me the ring and said, ” Would you do me the honor of making me the happiest man on earth and become my wife?”

Well,…..

OF COURSE I SAID YES! 😀

And I cried alot more. He slid the ring on my finger and we kissed and hugged. My mascara ran. The doorbell rang and his not to thrilled dad was there.

He came up and said a brief hello, for he was not happy about having to go out in the night after he was settled in and jump Adam’s car off.

Couldn’t blame him too much, but it was a weird way to meet your future father-in-law. Quick-zip!

They were gone and I was in the house all alone, saying prayers of thanks and waiting for the sound of the car in the drive.

20 minutes later he was back and we were headed for that Chinese!

We finished up the night with the perfect meal of spicy Chinese chicken curry and noodles, with a side of “prawn” crackers I had never heard of before but were awesome!

Never had anything felt more awesome than being there with him, getting officially engaged and learning all about our new home, my new new city and all the new family and surroundings life was now offering.

we topped it all off with a warm romantic fire popping and sizzling in the stove-fireplace, a glass or two of wine to celebrate…….AND……..

….A long skype session with my kids back home in the U.S!! LOL…..it was only 6:30pm there

A toe in the bath

I think my favourite saying is “In for a penny, in for pound” which simply means if you’re going to do something, bloody well do it good!! So after knowing that I’d fallen for Tammy, there was nothing left to do but to get a ticket to Texas!!!

Having not ever been to America before this was certainly going to be an amazing adventure, finally getting to meet Tammy after all this time! What an incredible few years it was proving to be, having nearly died in 2010 and then the separation with my ex after Christmas, moving out and leaving my children and then starting a new job!! My relationship with Tammy really was the cherry on top!! Never during that time did I ever doubt my sanity or think anything other than this was going to be fantastic!!

That’s the great advantage of Skype, we knew a boat load about each other as we had spent many hours talking and sharing our lives with one another.

Heathrow Terminal 5 – Come on!!!

Life is short and I want it to be sweet 🙂 Many of my friends and family were concerned about me, thinking that my trip to the states was some weird reaction to what had happened the previous year. They were half right 🙂 When you come close to dying you realise how fragile life is and that you can’t take one second of it for granted! Tammy living in Texas was no reason to avoid following my heart, it never felt wrong and so I went with the attitude, let’s dip the toe in the bath and see what happens.

As soon as we met, we kissed and it was a kiss like no other, it must have lasted a full 5 mins and it was sensational!! It was the middle of September and we’d be in a relationship for at least 5 months, so you can imagine how much pent up sexual tension there was lol.

Tammy drove me to her house and I got to meet her family 🙂 It was great to finally meet them all for real, it was a surreal moment but again it never felt wrong, I’d spoken to all of them on Skype many times and so it was seamless.

The next week Tammy and the kids shared their lives with me, it was a magic time! One of the highlights was when we all went to the drive in cinema and watched a couple of films with the seats all folded down and the tailgate open, Awesome!!

 The summer holidays were over and so Tammy took me to her University, where she is studying History and Religion as a mature student, I even got to sit in on her lectures, definitely my cuppa tea!

What was so nice was the feeling that we belong together, we are totally into the same things, of course we knew this before my trip to Texas, but there’s much more to a relationship than just sharing the same interests. It was a great relief to know and feel that everything felt right.

One of my favourite pictures

(left to right Maddison, yours truly, Tammy and Zoey)

Here’s another great memory of my visit.

One thing you need to understand about the US is it’s size!! The UK will fit into Texas approx. 3 times and so everyone drives just about everywhere in the US. Just the school run and a few trips to some local attractions accounted for just over a 1000 miles in one week!!!  So we had plenty of time for chatting, singing and wise crackin in the car.

(Centre is Alex 17, right is Ivory 13 and mid back seat is Maddie 10)

Bryant  11 – Super manga and pc artist!!

Zoey 6 (Peanut)

Ivory 13 (Pop Idol)

Rebecca (Tammy’s mum)

Pigeon (cutest dog on the planet)

Spending a week with Tammy and her wonderful family was one of the greatest weeks of my life and I’m so glad we decided to take a chance on each other 🙂

So there you have it, a brief description of my stay in Texas! Short but very, very sweet, I could write for ages and I still wouldn’t capture all of the fun we had or the feelings of happiness that we both felt. We both knew that we wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of our days together!

Adam x

Planning

    There was so much planning to do and as it is with most plans, they change. We have had to compromise and come up with back up plans and in the end,..we came up with a plan that worked…or at least has been blessed so far. I pray it continues to be so.

The first little bit of the journey was to mark our calendars. First, I marked mine for when I would have money to send his way to go towards a home for us that was going to be big enough for all. Two adults and seven children would eventually be ALL together.

Second, was the decision of which of my kids to take in the first round of the move overseas and which were to stay behind until I could obtain a job over in the UK to help more with expenses. As it stands, I cannot work for I go to school full time and then take care of my invalid grandmother who has Alzheimer’s. So, anytime I come into any money, I send it his way. I wish I could do more and he understands this.

I think the best days have been when I marked the calendar for him to come over, for when he moved into our new home where we would live and when I was counting down to fly overseas and spend 9 days with him and his family. 😀 😀

And now,..now I mark my calendar for our wedding!!!! WOOHOO!!! and for our final move over to be with him!!!

I will share some pictures of our lovely, happy home in King’s Lynn 🙂 xxx and also some pictures of my trip there to England.

Our visit to London took the shape of a London Bus tour and a stop was taken at the National Museum for Art, Picadilly Circus to see Eros, Trafalgar Square and Nelson’s Column.

Adam also gave me a tour of our new home in East Anglia, which consisted of trips to Wells next to Sea, Ely and it’s beautiful Cathedral, Cambridge and St John’s University, King’s Lynn town centre and Norwich city and of course our local seaside resort Hunstanton with Adam’s adorable kids Lewis and Jack xx

We shared an amazing time together and I hope you like the photo’s

Tammy x

 

Losing our Skype Cherries

No Escape

I remember emailing Tammy suggesting that we should take things to the next level and use Skype to talk and see each other, I felt that until we had done this we couldn’t really get to know each other, y’know ‘warts n all’. They say the camera never lies, well I’m not so sure of that these days with all the air brushing that goes on, but it’s definitely true of live video!!

There is no hiding place for your little idiosyncrasies when using a live video to communicate and I really wanted that face to face interaction with Tammy because of the intensity of our feelings for each other. Don’t get me wrong emails are great, especially with a time difference, (Texas is behind the UK by 6 hours!) and we use them many times daily; these tick the engine over until we get to speak over Skype usually after Tammy has returned from University or after the school run in the afternoon (Texas time).

I remember this email………

“Ebay have a usb video cam and integrated mic for a whopping 7 dollars, skype is free, sorted x”

What can I say? The first time we used Skype was amazing, emotional and perfect, we’d lost our Skype cherries lol and it was sensational, totally transforming our relationship, offering us credible chance at being a couple, way more than just good pen friends.

God knows how many hours we’ve spent on Skype talking to each and now other family members across the world, who’ve taken our experience and are using it to enjoy their relationships in different ways. We can’t recommend it enough and if you’ve never used it, well you’re missing a trick, video calls are totally free and it adds a beautiful dimension to calling your friends and family!!!

Without Skype I’m positive Tammy and I wouldn’t be where we are today, hence the shameless plug lol, we love it!!!

Adam x

Hearts on Fire

A Burning Desire……

 

This photo of Tammy was one of the first I saw of hers when we made friends on Facebook, to say it was a game changer is a massive understatement!

All of a sudden my feelings for Tammy went through the roof!!

We had been enjoying each others minds for sometime and I’d often wondered what she looked like and what her life was like; I was intrigued . Tammy’s blog is completely different to mine, hers has a professional look and feel to it, whereas mine was quite a personal blog, which contained a few family pictures and family related posts. It’s changed a bit since then, but that’s another story.

When I saw this picture on facebook there was no denying it, I fancied her BIG TIME!!! I’m sure most fella’s can understand why, she’s so beautiful and I was to learn that she has an equally beautiful heart and mind to match. Pretty soon we knew quite a lot about each other and having both recently separated, we confided in each other and our relationship grew exponentially.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Surely this couldn’t be happening?? What was I doing?? This is crazy!! I’d fallen for this girl from Texas and It was absolute magic!! We were emailing each other a lot by now and we both knew what was going on, but I couldn’t bring myself to stop, I was smitten, in love with someone 5000 miles away!!! ARGHH!!!!!

We were sending photo’s of each other and short films that we’d made to share our feelings and thoughts, our hearts were on fire and we wanted each other badly. I think it was spring 2011 that I told her that I wanted to visit her in Texas, she was so happy and excited, I was well chuffed when I knew she wanted me too!!

For those that don’t know me, I’m quite a reserved guy, rarely flamboyant or trendy and I’ve never been the life an soul of the party. Yet this to 99% of people would be a completely crazy proposition, but to us it’s never felt wrong, sure it’s difficult, but we both know that we have something very special and we know that we were meant to be together.

When you know and feel this as much we do, then the rest is quite simple, we’ll do whatever it takes to make our dream a reality, despite the reservations of others or the  minor issue of the 5000 miles between us!!

Adam x

The Joy of Skype

Without Skype?

Well I doubt our relationship would have been able to flourish into this cherished and loving friendship the both enjoy now, without Skype I’m sure we would have had to concede that our love affair could not have gone on. Sure in the past people have communicated via post and emails, but Skype really has turned all of that on its head!!

Now we use all of the above methods to communicate, with over 2500 emails and hundreds of Skype hours between us, I’d say we enjoy more communication than most couples do.

Nurturing a long distance relationship is insanely difficult and this ratchets up several gears after you finally get to meet each other and then have to say goodbye and return to the laptop for regular Skype sessions. I don’t think I’ve ever had to do anything so difficult. This type of relationship is not for the faint hearted or those who haven’t the self discipline or trust in your partner. Fortunately, Tammy and I have both of these qualities and we know how precious or love is 🙂

I think the major advantage a long distance relationship has over a conventional relationship is that you really have so much time to get to know your partner before you make any rushed commitments to each other. You take a conventional relationship where you can meet someone up a club and swap numbers etc. before you know it you’re horizontal and you barely know a thing about the person you’re with!! This can and does lead to many problems, which I’m glad I don’t have to worry about.

The major downside of a relationship like ours is that although the time we spend together is deeply treasured, saying goodbye is extremely painful and if you’re not strong could become too much to bear. Both Tammy and I are strong people, we have a plan that we’re working on that will in time see us living together forever!!

What is Skype?

In short, Skype is an internet telephone service with a difference, it lets you video call for FREE!!! This is indeed a massive innovation in communication, so much so that Microsoft have now purchased the company and are expanding it’s features at some rate. You can now conduct video conferencing for a small price, along with conventional calls and free SMS messaging, to name but a few.

This may sound like a plug and I guess it is lol, but I consider it the least I can do for a company that has changed my life infinitely for the best!!

Skype uses your broadband connection and so you need to be aware that it’s quite a hefty load on your internet allowance, especially if you’re on it every day like we are, therefore I recommend you opt for an unlimited package as you won’t be stung by a surprise bill every month.

Tammy and I will be posting soon about how we cope with the 6 hours time difference between England and Texas, so for now I’ll say goodbye and hope you found this article of some interest.

Adam x

How I met Tammy

Collision Course:

So how did all this begin?…….Well about 18 months to 2 years ago, whilst my then wife and I were realising that our marriage had failed, after work and the kids had gone to bed I spent a lot of time on my own, either making music or researching and writing my blog,

adamhad’em

Well it was the blogging that set me on a collision course with Tammy, and although I didn’t know it at the time, my destiny!!

As part of Tammy’s degree course she had to design and maintain a blog, which she did fantastically by the way, never before had I been so captivated by anybodies writing. Who is this amazing person? Where does she come from? What, how, where??? So many questions and I really wanted the answers!! Eventually I ventured to post a comment on her blog, well I felt way out of my depth, what would this amazing mind think of my comment I wondered……….Not a lot it seemed, no reply was forthcoming. Not thinking much of it and never being one to give up I ventured another comment on a another post of her a little later and this time we connected 🙂

Just a few words here and there as we commented on each others blog, now if you’ve never blogged you may find this hard to understand, but nowadays most people own a facebook account where you are actually, in effect, micro blogging to your friends and family. Those that do will understand the anticipation of replied comments to a post they’ve made. Both of us were writing all manner of articles for our blogs, Tammy’s always held my attention and I’d eagerly await her amazing insight and views of the world.

When my wife and I separated, I decided to get a facebook account in order to contact some of my old pals and family members that I’d not seen for ages, it was here that my relationship with Tammy exploded!

How I met Adam

How I met this amazing guy! (this pic is from my trip to visit him in England this year, but I just LOVE THAT SMILE!)

I was attending Cedar Valley College in Texas where I live. The thought occurred to me that I would really love to start a journalism website where all the students could come and discuss several topics, and exercise their creative writing. I talked it over with one of the English professors and in a couple of months of his advice and my hard work, www.portofembarkation.wordpress.com was born.

Were the angels of destiny at work?

Over the next several months I had found that not too many students caught on to it, but I kept it going. In the meantime, several other people on WordPress had started reading and commenting on the topics I had written of. I made a good friend in Canada through this and in turn from her following my site and re-posting some of my stories, “@damhadem” became a frequent visitor.

I always had a habit of checking out anyone else’s blog pages who visited mine and when I read his and looked at his profile, the first thought that went through my brain was, “this guy is awesome”. Especially thought this when his thoughts went introverted and he spoke of his family and how certain things in the world would have an affect on the future his boys would grow up in. And how he stated that he sat and watched his boys playing and I literally felt that he was full of passion and expression beyond just politics and criminal injustices of the world. I started to see him as a real man. I have 5 children of my own and I could feel his honest expressions over them.

Secretly, well,…..since this is a diary,….I was intellectually/mentally attracted to him and I had never even seen a real picture of him, just some monkey picture on his profile and distorted Photoshop profile that made him appear very old.

We did nothing more than keep in touch through commenting on each other’s blogs and our mutual friend’s blog in Canada. We all became close friends through lengthy discussions of many topics and we all loved what the other would write, even if we had disagreements, which were very few.

Eventually I started listening to the music he made on his  account and saw that he had even more talent than writing.

here is a link to one of my fav’s:      

 

A year later, changes had brought him to a new place in his life and he also set up a Facebook account, to which our friend in Canada and I accepted him and we made a pact to meet each other one day. I finally got to see pictures of him and my stomach did flip flops!

We started seeing more of each other’s personal lives on Facebook, seeing pictures of us in our different parts of the world and began emailing every day. We talked about our lives and our days and nights and our current relationships with other people. I saw that he was more than charming…he was a real prince of a man!

It wasn’t very long at all before either of us could deny that we were in love.

It was crazy to say, being 5,000 miles away, but it was very true!

I will never forget the first email when he told me he loved me and my heart flew into the sky!!

I wished he wasn’t so far away so I could have gone to him and said that I loved him too! I wanted to wrap my arms around him and kiss him RIGHT THEN!!

I thought he was AMAZING in all ways and I still think it….probably even more 😀

We spent a few months of knowing this was crazy to not caring if it was, to being totally awed by how much we found in one another we had always hoped for.

We tried to share more of our lives by sending videos of our days and outings. I couldn’t wait to get the next one!

Then we made a decision to really meet in person. He bought tickets to fly here in September 2011.

He arrived on the 16th.

All the months leading up to that were sheer anticipation! I remember being at the airport and jumping every time the sliding glass doors opened to let out the passengers from the international flight. I was SO NERVOUS.

When I saw him, everything I felt for him was amplified!

He was GORGEOUS! He was beautiful as men go. That coupled with what I already knew of his mind and heart,..well,..there was no holding back what I felt! When he came straight to me smiling and grabbed me up in a kiss, it was PERFECT! We fit perfectly and I think we kissed for a good 15 minutes….before moving from that spot.

My knees were shaky. I was so happy and filled up inside.

He was finally right there! Right there, with me!

We spent and amazing week together with my kids and I will post pictures on our “Photos” page for you to see of that week.

We knew, we were meant to be together and we both made the mutual decision for us to work towards being together for good!

I cannot wait for that!